Appropriate or inappropriate

I do not always say the most appropriate things on a date. I tend to get a little nervous and resort to telling stories that I think will show that I have a sense of humour and that I am comfortable in my own skin. However, after the other night, I believe I have met the male version of me - inappropriate as all hell, because this guy really thought he was charming. What did he say? well let's narrow it down...

'I am endowed'...INAPPROPRIATE

what should a woman say to that - "Prove it"? He was talking about a woman asking him if he was 3 or possibly 4 fingers wide...and he assured me he was 'fine in that department'. I laughed nervously, and responded with my own inappropriate story about the time a guy whipped it out and lay it on the table for me....For you men out there - a little note: we don't like this. It doesn't impress us. You want to know what impresses us? When you can keep it in your pants - that's impressive.

The Nice Package story...INAPPROPRIATE

He followed the endowed speech with a nice fun-filled story of how he was at the bar and this woman sought him out. She had been eyeing him from across the bar, walked up to him and said "I saw your package from way over there and so I had to come say hi." Why, why would he tell me this? Should I have been impressed? Again - what did he expect my reaction to be? I laughed nervously and thought about the best possible way to get home...or at the very least out of this date.

'This girl I was dating....this other girl I was seeing...this other one I met" Geez, do I even have to say it? INAPPROPRIATE

I get it, he wanted me to know that other women have found him attractive, he's in high demand...if I snooze, I lose...but really I don't care. Find another subject matter to impress a new date with - how about talking about your career? interests you might have other than past dates? hobbies? sports? knitting?

'You're better looking than your picture'...a lie, but APPROPRIATE

we like compliments, even if we don't know how to take them. As long as there's some hint that it could be truthful, I can convince myself that he means it and I am ALL over it.

This date was memorable. I will forever remember having someone tell me they were endowed. I also am very close to writing my next blog on 'how to piss off a man in 10 emails or less'. This ice princess has a way with words...but that's for next time.